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We are Having a Sock Sale!

Get up to 50% off our wacky collection of feet warmers. Sale ends Dec 20th.

Shop the sock sale

Gears Out

The Golden Schlong Sweater

The Golden Schlong Sweater

$9.95
$9.95
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The Golden Schlong Sweater

As delicate as the schlong is, it deserves something extra special to keep it warm at night. Finally, a worthy willy warmer has been created to handle the cozy care of an area as important as the family jewels…The Golden Schlong Sweater! This hand-knit crotch cloak will have your royal goody bag feeling like a million bucks, no matter how chilly it gets.

The Golden Schlong Sweater is made to fit most fellas, and even includes an elegant golden drawstring around the top to keep it snugly in place. Designed specifically for keeping the most precious of parts warm, this winter must-have will have the royal wedding tackle safe and secure.

Specs, Features and Bragging Rights

  • Attractive yellow and gold, knit package warmer fit for a king
  • One size fits most
  • Golden drawstring keeps this royal man-mitten secure in winter winds
  • Hilarious gag gift for men on birthdays, anniversaries, and holidays
  • Best stocking stuffer for guys

An Excellent Novelty Gift for the King of the Castle

Crowning this year’s list of funny gag gifts for men, the Golden Schlong Sweater is sure to be a hilarious hit for any gift-giving occasion. Wrap up this naughty gift for your anniversary, birthday gag gift, or a super surprising stocking stuffer for men who constantly complain they’re freezing their crown jewels off.

NOVELTY USE ONLY