You know what they say about a lobster with big claws?
Big tails.
We’ve all looked at the lobster with envy as he effortlessly crosses the seafloor with his massive pinchers. You no longer have to suffer from claw envy thanks to these Giant Lobster Claws.
Sure, you can kiss your fine motor skills goodbye, but if you’re going for menacing, then these claws are for you. They fit most hands and are guaranteed to get some surprised looks when you go to pay for your gas using THE CLAW. Yeah, it’s awesome. That’s why it’s here.
Huge Lobster Claw Hands
The only grabber that doesn’t require a heart surgeon.
Good luck putting together that 1,000 piece puzzle you got for your birthday with the Huge Lobster Claw Hands. They’ll give everyone a fright and provide you with hours of frustration. Finally, you’ll know what it’s like for a lobster to use the bathroom. Good luck cleaning your bum or buttoning your designer jeans with giant claws.
Specs, Features and Bragging Rights
- Each huge lobster claw measures 1' 3"
- Comes in a Pair
- Look like giant cooked lobster claws, because fresh claws would just be weird
- Made of latex
- Great for freaking people out at the beach or scaring young children
Who would love Hugh Lobster Claw Hands?
Seriously, who wouldn’t? If you know anyone with a love for this heavily shelled seafood, then let them commune with their inner crustacean. They can experience what it’s like to be a lobster without all that worry of being boiled alive. You’ll get a whole new appreciation for your favorite ocean dweller as you try sign a credit card slip with claw hands.
Frequently asked questions
Will lobsters who see me treat me like a piece of meat?
While the Huge Lobster Claw Hands are attractive and will get you some nods on the beach, odds are you’re not going to make the cover of Lobster GQ. If you do become weary of being an object of desire, simply eat them and the problems go away.
Should I drive wearing Hugh Lobster Claw Hands?
Do you see many crabs and lobsters driving along the Interstate? Most likely, the answer is no, and there’s a good reason. Sure, they’re tiny and live in water, but their claw hands are also a hindrance when gripping steering wheels. Lobsters have a hard enough time controlling their descent into the maw of a whale let alone an overpass. Keep the claws off when you’re going to drive.
